Yesterday, I looked at my website several dozen times. Two days ago, I put a few tiny pieces of myself on a few tiny web pages, and so now what? Are people looking at it? Weebly says about 80 separate people stopped by, but who are those people? Still no comments. Does that mean that it isn't comment worthy, or just that those who looked didn't have anything to say? Perhaps those who looked were repulsed, or insulted, or simply angry that they wasted their limited time looking at trash like this. Maybe this was a bad idea. The nerve of someone, who admits he doesn't like writing, starting a blog and then having the first entry basically broadcast to anyone who might have read it, "Hey, look at me! I am about to do something I hate doing! Doesn't that sound boring? Don't invest any more time reading because clearly it won't last. Remember, I hate this!"
Woah! Where does all this fear come from? I have been too successful in my life to be someone crippled by fear. So what if it is what our society is based on? Of course, our society was also built on the backs of slaves, and we seem to still be fighting that fight, so maybe it makes sense to be fearful of that which is new or hard or public or personal. Okay, so one more thing to fight against (and two more things to write about in future posts: Fear and Slavery)! But for now, let me attempt to share my goals for myself (becoming a blogger) and for this blog in general:
So now, I guess I print this list out and tape it to the lower left corner of my laptop, right? Sounds like a plan. Thanks again for reading, and please let me know if you did. A comment would be great, but even a simple "Like" would be rad. This may just be the fear talking again, but your comments may help bring me a little closer to understanding it all. Thanks for your support.
Woah! Where does all this fear come from? I have been too successful in my life to be someone crippled by fear. So what if it is what our society is based on? Of course, our society was also built on the backs of slaves, and we seem to still be fighting that fight, so maybe it makes sense to be fearful of that which is new or hard or public or personal. Okay, so one more thing to fight against (and two more things to write about in future posts: Fear and Slavery)! But for now, let me attempt to share my goals for myself (becoming a blogger) and for this blog in general:
- Understand my relationship to writing (see Blog post #1)
- Understand my relationship to a culture of fear (see above)
- Inspire dialogue (okay, that is something new - a.k.a write stuff that people want to read)
- Build a habit of daily reflection (this is where I commit to 3 blog posts weekly and make my first attack on #2)
- Build community (I realize the flailing I am doing now with these initial blogs aren't going to unite friends and family, let alone recruit others to create meaningful bonds around anything, but I am optimistic about eventually hitting my flow, and here I will have a record of how it started)
- Find joy (I'm not entirely sure what I mean by this yet, but it's definitely part of it)
- Laugh (This is kind of part of #6, but I want to name it specifically because I specifically want to laugh: with and at myself and others and the world. Also, 7 seems better to me than 6)
So now, I guess I print this list out and tape it to the lower left corner of my laptop, right? Sounds like a plan. Thanks again for reading, and please let me know if you did. A comment would be great, but even a simple "Like" would be rad. This may just be the fear talking again, but your comments may help bring me a little closer to understanding it all. Thanks for your support.
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